10.12.08
A Band of Black Hills Gold
The rings we wear on our hands can have very diverse and tradition-enriched meanings. Take a look at the rings you own and wear. You may have one that was passed down from a great-grandmother or maybe one that displays an accomplishment such as a graduation or a championship victory. There are rings to show purity, status or birth month, and of course, the most common, the wedding ring.
Some cultures don’t use a ring of metal worn on the “ring” finger of the left hand, but typical American culture does. In a traditional man/woman relationship, the woman wears a ring of gold or some other type of metal with a solitary diamond throughout the engagement period. Then during the wedding ceremony, the man and woman exchange rings of (typically) gold bands.. Nowadays, there are so many more choices with wedding rings.
My wedding ring was traditional. My husband and I both had plain gold bands. No diamonds, no engravings, just very simple gold rings. I was very proud to wear my ring and so was Rod, my husband, who passed away about eleven years ago now. We never took them off. They were on our hands for almost thirteen years with the exception of my last pregnancy. I had retained so much water that my hands became bloated and the doctor was afraid I would have to have my ring cut off. So I asked Rod to remove it and he gave me a necklace of his to wear with the ring so I would still have it with me. As soon as I was able, the ring went back to it’s rightful spot. The next time one of us removed our wedding band was when my husband was in the hospital dying. He asked me to take it off and put it in a safe place so that it wouldn’t get taken off by a nurse, doctor or mortician.
When we had been married for seven years, Rod bought me a nice ring for Christmas that was made from Black Hills gold and very similar to his mother’s ring which I had always admired. My ornate ring was worn with my simple gold band as an addition to my wedding ring, not in place of.
When Rod died, all of these rings were placed on a necklace along with a locket which had his picture in it. I wore it every day for several months until I had a scare. The clasp suddenly let go and the rings fell. I didn’t want to risk losing them, so I put them in my jewelry box.
About six years later, I was preparing to sell my house and move into a smaller one. During this time, I down-sized much of belongings, including some things of Rod’s that I was hanging on to. I also went through that last step of grieving that I kept telling myself I didn’t need..anger. I distributed several objects of importance to our children. If none of them wanted it, I decided whether or not to keep it for them to have in the future or to just get rid of it. When it came to the rings, none of the kids wanted them and I really didn’t want to just throw them away.
Also at this time, I was engaged to a man that I had known since high school and he was very uncomfortable with anything of Rod’s around. He said he felt like he was in competition with him. I realize that it was something he had imposed on himself, but I wanted to help him through this and if it meant getting rid of a few rings, then I could do that. So, I took the rings to a pawn shop, including the one made of Black Hills gold.
Four years later, I am thankfully, no longer engaged. I was talking to a co-worker about her wedding ring and told her about my act of stupidity and how I wished I hadn’t pawned the rings. After work that day, I decided to go to the pawn shop just to see if, by chance, the rings might be there. I stepped in and immediately felt overwhelmed. There were so many pieces of jewelry. How was I ever going to find something so small that was pawned four years ago? I convinced myself a quick look wouldn’t hurt anything. Time seemed to stop as I moved slowly in front of the glass cases. One after another with nothing looking familiar. Then, with a gasp and a feeling of warm tears in my eyes, I leaned down in front of a case with my Black Hills gold ring sitting in a black velvet holder! Barely able to get the words out, I turned to a guy in the back cleaning and he asked if I need to look at something in the case.
I quietly spoke, “No, I would just like to purchase the Black Hills gold ring with the two leaves in this case here,” as I pointed to the general area.
He asked if I wanted to try it on and I explained that I knew it fit because it’s mine. Those words sounded good to my ears and to my heart. I didn’t even bother looking at the price tag, because I was prepared to pay whatever it cost.
He said, “You’re lucky it’s still here. It’s been here for about four years.”
I told him I wasn’t lucky, I was blessed.
I thanked him and walked out to my car. As soon as the door was shut, I sobbed. I was in awe. With this ring made from Black Hills gold, I have a tradition of promises, love, grace and forgiveness. The stories attached with this ring will be passed down for generations, whether the ring remains or not. God is present even in what we consider to be the little things. His tradition will be passed on and will ever remain a presence in my life.
